♀ or ♂??

Hey,

Have you ever had a crush? I have practically no experience with this kind of thing, so if you guys have any advice, it would definitely be appreciated!

Ok, so I think I have a crush on a girl in my year. I’ve never had a proper crush before, I’ve seen people that I think are good looking and hot, but this is different. If you are a girl, I bet 99.9% you have played truth or dare, and have been asked who you have a crush on. Do you tell them? I always said, I didn’t have one. No one would believe me, “what about that boy you said was hot?”, its not the same thing. In the end I would make up that I liked someone “from out of school” just to keep them quiet.

Now a days, if someone asked me. I still wouldn’t say anything. Not because I’m scared, but I don’t want people to think of me differently. I mean COME ON, I go to an all-girls school, everyone will think I’m in love with them or something. Also, I’m not CERTAIN I’m gay, and imagine if I told everyone, then I realised I was straight. Yup, that would not be great.

I’m pretty confused with my sexuality still, but that’s not weird, because I’m a teenager. That’s what happens. Everyone questions it. I haven’t kissed a boy since I was 10 and I’ve never kissed a girl, so I don’t have much comparison.

I’m pretty sure its a crush. I love her cute grin. She smiles more then she thinks she does. She has dark hair and eyes, and pale face dotted with freckles. We share similarities such as the dislike of exercise and the love of anime and YouTube (our generation is so screwed!). I want her to like me, to think I’m cute too. When she told a girl she looked pretty, something in me flared up. The problem is, she isn’t interested in me. We are on speaking terms, I could ask to borrow a pencil, or whatever, but she doesn’t hang out with me and her best friend and mine are in an argument. Thanks guys!  Everyone says “be yourself” but if you like someone and they don’t like you, you want to know how you can change that. Right? I realised we must be too different, but how can In think about someone all the time, if we don’t have much in common?

I know she is probably never going to like me, the way I like her. I don’t even know if she likes girls. *sigh* I’m joking, its ok.

If you guys have any experience, please pass it on! If you are new to my blog, check out my about page:  ” Welcome..? “and my “Awkward First Post“.

Hope everyone had a good day 🙂

See you guys around,

Lexi

 

 

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6 thoughts on “♀ or ♂??

  1. I really hope that you get a chance with her! Maybe try talking a bit more or smiling when she looks at you? I think if you look friendly and welcoming she will maybe want to hang out with you more? I talked to a group of friends once and we were discussing sexuality. We all came out as having the same thought am that we didn’t know if we where straight or gay or bisexual. I think it’s a part of teenage hood . You discover yourself and your sexuality. I hope this helped ! ❤❤

    Liked by 1 person

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